By Marlene McBean

What happens when you get married thinking it’s the Lord’s will for you and it turns out in disaster? This is where the real struggle begins. For the first part of the marriage everything looks fine and dandy. You say to yourself I’ve found the man or woman of my dreams… “Wolf in sheep clothing.”

You were sure this partner was the right one.

Now you marry this man or woman, who is supposed to be a child of God, your companion, your friend, your lover and when you check it out life is worse than when you started.  He or she starts being dishonest with you, turn the children against you and when you really look into things, there is no one there for you. Your spouse doesn’t care about the family’s well-being.

You’re trying to hold on but every time your partner makes you look bad in front of other people, bills are piling up. Nothing is working.  You’re praying, it’s not getting any better. You want to leave but because of the kids or church you’re holding on, but to what?

You are ready to give up

You’re ready to give up and move on but where do you go to find peace? It’s tough.  There are no more tears left, no emotions.  Now remember, your partner was your first love, you know no one else.  OMG! Life is so full of struggles. What examples are being set for these children to follow? How can they be better in the society we are living in? 

Well your heart is being broken, you are depressed, you have been abused and the list goes on. You are too ashamed to go back home so really what do you do?

At a crossroads.

You’re at a cross road, leave or stay you ask yourself.  You ponder this so many times. You even start to retaliate and that makes it worse. It won’t help.  Do I walk out or get a divorce? The church is against divorce, so your heart is crying out…”God where are you?” The decision is yours to make.

First of all, did you seek God, or even watched for the signs before getting married?   Being a young virgin wanting to do the right thing so you think you’re in love, and he or she looks and do all the right things, makes you feel like it’s the perfect person? He or she may even have a position in church. In your eyes he or she is the partner for you because of a strong spirituality and the church brethren will even encourage you to marry this person but in God’s eyes Your spouse wasn’t.  Remember people pretend well, even Christians. God had a better plan for you Jeremiah 29:11.

It is really a rough time

 This situation is devastating for anyone to go through especially a child of God. You will lose focus and get weak as there are going to be times when you can’t even pray. You keep asking yourself why did you get into this mess? At this time you would have realized that the Church is not helping, instead they criticize and talk about you.  The Bible tells us that we wrestle not against flesh and blood (Ephesian 6 vs 12). One would have to recognize who or what they’re fighting against.  You have to understand that the enemy uses strategies so you have to know them.  Remember, the enemy is like a roaring lion, he doesn’t have a body to work in so if you’re available, he will definitely use your body. You have to know what spirit he or she is operating in. He uses you to fight against each other creating havoc in the home. 

There is a need for counselling

This is the time when counseling is needed, prayer and fasting are needed and most of all knowing and using the word of God. Get some payer warriors to help you fast and pray and God will fix it or remove him or her from your life. 

Here is the other thing you will need, FAITH.  Yes FAITH! (Mark 11 vs 22 and 25)- This is a must have or else the situation won’t change.  You will have to fully understand how faith works and apply it. Stretch it as far as you can. You have to spend quality time with God on your knees in prayer and fasting.

God is forgiving, so don’t beat up yourself for past mistakes. Acknowledge them and repent. Trust in the Lord with all thine heart. Proverbs 3:5 don’t try to fix it on your own, you’ll never win. You’ll end up losing the battle. Think about what you may have done to cause this problem and ask for forgiveness, he will forgive you and you also will need to forgive yourself.  After you done all, he will direct you to the path you must take.  God’s angels are watching over you. You shall live to testify.

People please give your views. I’m just speaking from my heart, maybe you’ll get a different revelation that can help someone.  Don’t let a wounded soldier die. 

Please place your comments on the website.  Much appreciated.